Every morning I wake up and rapidly go through 5 stages that get me from sound asleep to on my feet...
1. "What the fuck?": This is always number 1. Appropriate and self explanatory.
2. "What the fuck is that?": This is in reference to my alarm. No matter how many times I wake up to it I will always be dumbfounded as to what the hell that sound is.
3. "Jesus Christ...": This is usually after I've hit the alarm and my head comes crashing back down to my pillow. I take a few breaths and then it's...
4. "Shit": This is me coming to the realization that I am going to have to physically remove myself out from under my covers, get vertical, and start my day.
5. "Goddammit": This is during the actual physical rise out of bed.
And then I'm up! Ready to start the day! After these 5 simple stages of advancing coherency, I'm ready to go out and inspire the masses to eat right and work out!