Wednesday, January 11, 2006

Finkler's Redemption

For the longest time Steve Finkler and I have had a bit of rivalry over WWE Superstar Kurt Angle...

Since the beginning when I started watching wrestling I've always respected Kurt Angle. For those who don't know, Kurt is a legitimate Olympic hero, having won a gold medal at the 1996 Olympics in Atlanta Georgia in freestyle wrestling in the 220lb. class. To watch him wrestle is to watch an artist at work. He is perfect. He moves with fluidity, and grace.

His character in the WWE is the arrogant asshole who is a gold medalist, who can't pass up the opportunity to tell others about it, and insists that he is everyone's Olympic hero. He claims to live by his three "I's"... Intelligence, Integrity, and Intensity. The last "I" is the only thing he lives true to. Otherwise, his character is the most underhanded, perverse, classless superstar in the WWE.

For some reason, Steve really attached himself to Angle, and one day I must have made some negative comment about him, and Steve jumped all over my ass about it. This was 4 years ago. He insisted that at some point I was a big Angle supporter, which I don't particularly remember, but he insists it's true, and ever since he's been pushing me to get back into Angle. Like I said, I have nothing but respect for Kurt Angle. I'd say he's one of the top 5 superstars in the WWE today. I'm thoroughly entertained by him. But for the sake of argument, I've fought Steve on this Angle thing since he brought it up. Angle makes it easy for me, as he's always pulling some classless act such as demanding to have sex with someone's wife, or engaging in beastiality. So it's not too hard to fight Steve on his claim of Angle's greatness. Angle's win/loss record also works in my favor. As great as a wrestler as Angle is, he ultimately loses about 98% of his matches. He manages to win the really big ones that matter the most, but week to week usually screws himself, by trying to cheat and it backfiring on him. I'm hardly the only one who isn't pulling for Angle. For the past 4 years Kurt Angle has not ONCE been able to come down to the ring to compete without the entire crowd chanting in beat with his entrance music, "YOU SUCK!" Like me, everyone one of those people respect the shit out of Kurt Angle. It's just part of his character, and it's fun for the fans.

Every title match Angle competes in is very tense for Steve and I now. Neither of us usually have a vested interest in any match in particular, but somehow our pride has now been put on the line everytime Angle competes for the title. Like I said, Angle's win/loss record works in my favor more often than not. Just this past Sunday, Angle competed in an Elimination Chamber match for the WWE Championship. Deep down, I had a feeling Angle was going to win it. I even called it, and admitted it to Steve before the match. Miraculously Angle was the FIRST guy to be eliminated. The whole bar erupted in celebration, chanting ANGLE SUCKS!!!

I have enjoyed many a celebration over Kurt Angle's losses. Poor Steve, I think has taken this a little too personally sometimes. It's really all in good fun. I think it's just frustrating for him to be on the losing end so often. I am a bit rough on him though. I rarely pass up an opportunity to rip on Angle, or accuse Steve and Angle of being lovers. Everytime Angle has a title shot I wear a shirt Holly helped me make that says "Angle Sucks!". (Which I incidentally have gotten many compliments on at the bars we're at for the PPV's). For Steve's birthday, I got him a shirt that said, "I took it in the ass from Kurt Angle, and all I got was this lousy shirt!"

This morning as I was having my morning coffee, checking for the latest updates as I usually do... They announced that at the taping for Smackdown last night, which will air this Friday night, The World Heavyweight Champion, Batista, was stripped of the title due to injuries that will not allow him to compete for 6 - 9 months. With the title vacated, a battle royal was held to determine a new champion.

In an unprecedented turn of events, Kurt Angle who is NOT on the Smackdown roster, but is from RAW, was somehow allowed into the battle royal and WON The World Heavyweight Championship!


Like I said, this won't air until Friday and currently Steve knows nothing of it. I'm not going to tell him. I was planning on skipping going to his place this Friday night for Smackdown to do other things, but now I have an obligation to be there. I owe it to Steve to be there in person, so that he may revel in this rare victory. I have rubbed Angle's losses in his face for 4 fucking years. This Friday night, will be a HUGE night for Steve Finkler. So I'm canceling my plans, and I'm going over there to take my lumps like a man.

All I can say is that I hope Angle holds onto that title until Wrestlemania 22, so that I may be there in person to watch him lose it!


1 comment: